Saturday Thoughts

When I return from a holiday I always feel full of ideas and inspiration.  As I said previously it is like pressing the reset button.  I become aware of the bad habits, the 'rut' life has fallen into and come home determined to change things.  Sometimes it works, changes are made.  Other times the change is just too big and I don't achieve it.  When we came back from Canada, I really wanted to go back for a far longer period.  Not to emigrate but too work out there for a year.  It didn't happen, running our own business meant we couldn't just take a sabbatical, there would be no business to come back to.  The children were also of the age that they didn't want to leave their life here.  Now that they are grown and independent I still could not imagine being that far away from them, and of course there are grandchildren now, we would miss so much of their early years.

What I have brought home from this holiday is the feeling that moving back out into the countryside again is what I really need to do.  As we drove home and got nearer to the city, we left the quiet roads and faced traffic jams and aggressive drivers.  Yesterday we ate breakfast looking out over fields, watching as a huge bird of prey glided over the fields looking for breakfast.  In the evenings we walked around the farm, the only noise we could here was shuffling noises in the hedges from hidden creatures.  The thrill of seeing the wild deer in their environment is an experience that will stay with me for many years.  The noises of the evening here have changed.  The fields that were next to our house where we could hear foxes are now filled with houses.  Children who are far too young to be out at that time in the evening are screaming and shouting constantly.  Later, too often, to be replaced with their parents holding parties and drunkenly shouting and swearing until silly o'clock in the morning with no regard to people around them trying to sleep. We are increasingly becoming part of the city rather than living on the outskirts as hundreds of houses are being built on every available space.   Don't get me wrong I do love cities, I love the buzz, the sights, the night life, the people.....but only for a while, then I want solitude.  Maybe I am getting old and grumpy.

I want space around me.  I want to hear the sounds of nature.  I need to make this happen somehow.  My ongoing health problems have been holding me back, I have to take things gently, it may take a long time, but hopefully I will be able to fulfil this dream. Yes you are probably thinking I have the countryside and beaches on my doorstep, but this isn't enough any more.

In the blogging world many of you seem to have made the leap and be living your new life, I love reading your blogs of your new lives.  While others like me are still working towards their dreams and I love reading about your progress.  Have any of you out there thought you wanted something, which turned out to be the wrong move?  I do have a little niggle in my head that in the bleak winter I may long for nearby shops and even street lights.  I am a lot older than when we last lived in the middle of nowhere.

There have been many mentions of cheese scones in the blog world lately.  This morning realising I had no gluten free biscuits, snacks or anything else for when I have the munchies I made some gluten free cheese scone.  Then proceeded to scoff half of them!

We have also swept the chimney today so I'm looking forward to lighting the fire.  I don't think you can beat an open fire crackling away.


Chickpea xx

Welcome to Hettie and Andrea