Hi all you lovely people, sorry for being such a rubbish blogger at the moment but I'm incredibly busy working on 'the biggie' on my 60 things to do before I'm 60. That would be the little matter of moving house! The house has been pimped and preened to within an inch of its life and is now on the market! EEEEKKKKK!!! I must say it looks pretty damned good, I don't know why I'm moving!
When the for sale board went up it felt very very real. We have been here 15 years and it is a much loved happy home, but it is time to move on. To start the next stage of our lives, whatever that may be. I'm not even sure what I want that to be any more, I'm having doubts.
We haven't actually found any where else to live.........I'm not going to panic.........yet
Do I really want to live in the countryside..........or beside the sea? I'm tying myself in knots.
Doubts fill my mind, prevent me from sleeping, too many choices, too many decisions. Such HUGE decisions to be made, and I'm not sure we are exactly on the same page. Himself sends me 'bling' properties, I send him properties with 'potential'. I don't mind roughing it for a while, after all we lived in a caravan in his mothers field for three years while we saved up the deposit for our first house. He says he's too old to be 'camping' out in a building site. I want fields, he asks who will look after them...... Am I physically up to all the work, I'm still not completely recovered from my operations, will I ever be?
What do I want? I haven't seen one single property that feels right. Perhaps this is telling me something.
So what have I learned so far?
Estate agent don't exactly lie but are damned good at leaving out the important information like the extremely busy road right next to the cottage 'in the country'. The house right next door to the 'secluded cottage' The very very low ceilings even for me at 5'1" in a house that didn't need any work, mmm yes apart from the roof being taken off and lifted unless you are happy to keep bumping your head. The VERY bad lane that even my truck had problems getting down. It is really annoying for us and the seller, and wastes both are time. A bit more honesty is needed.
I don't know why I'm so worried about everything being impossibly tidy as none of the houses we have seen so far have been tidy. I can see beyond that at the potential, but I'm sure it would put some people off. I'm driving the bearded one mad as every time he puts something down, I put it away somewhere, usually forgetting where I stashed it.
So I am sitting here waiting for that first message saying someone wants to view our home. It's been on the market one day and I'm already worrying, perhaps I put it on at too high a price. Well we are not in a hurry as we can't find anywhere to buy so we might as well 'test the market' see I'm getting the lingo. Our last house sold in two days, it's too much to ask that this happens again. It's only been one day FFS! calm down.......
I just hate this feeling of being in limbo, not being in control of my destiny. Not even knowing what I want my destiny to be at the moment.......doubts are creeping in.....
Sorry for the rambling nonsense, I just needed to get it off my chest.